This past week a former student of mine who reads my blog sent me three text messages in fairly rapid succession. They each made me laugh out loud. The humor was definitely quite sophisticated, and I decided to round up some very short, yet very high-powered bits of humor. Don't feel bad if you don't get some of them ... I don't either.
The first three are the ones my friend sent me — the ones that got this blog post rolling.
People often accuse me of "stealing other people's jokes" and being a "plagiarist." Their words, not mine.
Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?
I hate explaining puns to kleptomaniacs. They take things literally.
(Thanks JA for inspiring this post!)
Never trust atoms. They make up everything!
How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce unionized.
I'm addicted to brake fluid, but I can stop whenever I want.
There are two types of people in the world — those who crave closure
There are two types of people in the world — those who can extrapolate from incomplete data sets
There are only 10 kinds of people — those who understand binary and those who don't.
There are two rules for ultimate success in life — 1. Never tell everything you know.
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
A plateau is the highest form of flattery.
That woman is so classless, she could be a Marxist utopia.
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