ivman's blague rotating header image loading ... please wait....

Christmas Cookie Rules


picture of Christmas cookies

A favorite tradition of the Christmas season is Christmas cookies. There are some that each family just has to make each year, or it wouldn't be Christmas. There are cookies that we make only at this time of year because of their strong tie in our minds and hearts to Christmas time. And every family's list is different. Today I'm posting a list of rules to make you feel better about your Christmas cookie consumption.

Christmas Cookie Rules

1. If you eat a Christmas cookie fresh out of the oven, it has no calories because everyone knows that the first one is the test cookie and thus calorie free.

2. If you drink a diet soda after eating your second cookie, it also has no calories because the diet soda cancels out the cookie calories.

3. If a friend comes over while you're making your Christmas cookies and needs to sample, you must sample with your friend. Because your friend's first cookie is calories free, (rule #1) yours is also. It would be rude to let your friend sample alone and, being the friend that you are, that makes your cookie calorie free.

4. Any cookie calories consumed while walking around will fall to your feet and eventually fall off as you move. This is due to gravity and the density of the caloric mass.

5. Any calories consumed during the frosting of the Christmas cookies will be used up because it takes many calories to lick excess frosting from a knife without cutting your tongue.

6. Cookies colored red or green have very few calories. Red ones have three and green ones have five — one calorie for each letter. So make more red ones!

7. Cookies eaten while watching Miracle on 34th Street have no calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.

8. As always, cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breaking causes caloric leakage.

9. Any cookies consumed from someone else's plate have no calories since the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling to their plate. We all know how calories like to cling!

10. Any cookies consumed while feeling stressed have no calories because cookies used for medicinal purposes never have calories. It's a rule!

So go enjoy those Christmas Cookies — we get them only at this time of year!

Now, do you believe any of that? 🙂 What kinds of cookies are on your list for this time of year?

Becka and I wish you and yours blessings at Christmas!

picture of Christmas banner

quotation...

"If we are going to be rescued by Him who came as a child, we must come to Him with the humility of a child ourselves." — Drew Conley

=^..^= =^..^=
Rob

Since fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing, does it matter whether you are fat or slim?


Print This Post Print This Post


If you enjoyed this post, to get updates when I post to my blog, sign up for your preferred method below — RSS, Twitter, or e-mail.



6 Comments on “Christmas Cookie Rules”

  1. #1 Donna Lawrence
    on Dec 23rd, 2010 at 7:55 am

    Mom puts together Ritz crackers with peanut butter and dips them in chocolate. Simple, but wonderful! My husband and brother-in-law would (and sometimes do) eat them for breakfast!

    Rob adds: They sound good to me, Donna. 😀

  2. #2 JoAnne in Keller, TX
    on Dec 23rd, 2010 at 8:18 am

    Haystacks are a must have at Christmas – broken pretzels, dry roasted peanuts, white chocolate – yum! Easy and everyone loves them.

    Rob adds: Sounds like a winner to me!

  3. #3 Beth Palm
    on Dec 23rd, 2010 at 8:19 am

    Rob, It seems we have had most of these rules all along and have always followed them diligently! Thank you for the enumeration, it really helped with the others we were unaware of! Oh, if you think of any rules for pies… 😀 Have a Merry Christmas!

    Rob adds: You are welcome, Beth. I’ll be on the lookout for rules for pies, since we know that pies rule!

  4. #4 David McGuire
    on Dec 23rd, 2010 at 8:24 am

    Now that I have a few free minutes from up here in Minnesota, I would like to add that food of any kind comes in two forms: it’s either fat free or it’s free fat. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

    Rob adds: Well stated, David. Enjoy the tundra!

  5. #5 Steve Coon
    on Dec 23rd, 2010 at 10:32 am

    When I was a little boy (very long ago), our next-door neighbor was a Swedish immigrant who talked and dressed very much different than our other small-town acquaintances. She brought with her from Sweden the most delightful recipe for “Swedish Ginger Cookies,” made with cloves, ginger, cinnamon, grated orange rind (and the juice), and the other cookie-type stuff. To my whole family, they became the very essence of the smell (mostly), and the taste of Christmas. Karen now makes them for our kids (and us). To make them right is a bit of an art, however, and the kids tell us that when we are gone, they think the recipe and tradition will be gone as well. (But I bet they’ll try harder to make them when they have to!) We are enjoying some while here in frozen Nebraska, and will take more to Colorado.

    Rob adds: Steve, you’ve got to let us try those cookies — they sound wonderful! Have a great time with the kids and grandkids!

  6. #6 Carrie
    on Dec 25th, 2010 at 8:25 pm

    My mom made candy cane cookies, red and white twisted and shaped into a cane shape. As an adult I made them and about lost my sanity! I called Mom and asked her why she made them if they were so much work. She replied that she liked to see us smile. It made me cry!

    Rob adds: Wow! Isn’t a mother’s love amazing?!