We have no idea when we will die and what the last words from our mouths will be. That's one reason that I often tell the people that I love, "I love you." That may be the last thing they will ever hear me say. That's one way in which I would like to be remembered.
My dad died at the young age of 42. Shortly before my last visit to my parents' home before Dad's death, I had broken up with a young lady named Becka. The last thing I remember my dad saying during that weekend visit was, "You know I have never commented on any of the girls you have dated, but I think breaking up with Becka was a mistake." How right he was! I wish he knew how precious his last words have been to me through the years. Becka and I eventually got back together after my father had passed away. I know he would have blessed our marriage if he had lived to see it.
I recently received a list of funny famous last words that someone has probably uttered ... or could have uttered, depending on the circumstances. With that list in mind, I did some searching to find the last words of some well-known people. Some of their last words were prophetic and some were ironic and humorous. After these real last words, I'll share the list of funny ones you could almost hear someone saying.
"A dying man can do nothing easy." — Benjamin Franklin, statesman, April 17, 1790
"It is well, I die hard, but I am not afraid to go." — George Washington, first US President, December 14, 1799
"Is it the Fourth?" — Thomas Jefferson, US President, July 4, 1826
"Thomas Jefferson ... still survives...." — John Adams, US President, July 4, 1826 (Actually, Mr. Adams didn't know Jeffereson had died earlier that same day.)
"Lord help my poor soul." — Edgar Allan Poe, writer, October 7, 1849
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." — General John Sedgwick, Union Commander, uttered right before he was shot, May 9, 1864
"Either that wallpaper goes, or I do." — Oscar Wilde, writer, November 30, 1900
"It is very beautiful over there." — Thomas Alva Edison, inventor, October 18, 1931
"Doctor, do you think it could have been the sausage?" Paul Claudel, French poet, February 23, 1955
Now on to the fun list....
Famous Last Words
"Sure it's fireproof."
"He's probably just hibernating."
"What does this button do?"
"It's probably just a rash."
"You're sure the power is off?"
"Pull the pin and count to what?"
"Which wire was I supposed to cut?"
"I wonder where the mother bear is."
"I've seen this done on TV."
"These are the good kind of mushrooms."
"I'll hold it and you light the fuse."
"Let it down slowly."
"The odds of that happening have to be a million to one!"
"It's strong enough for both of us."
"That didn't taste right."
"I can make the light before it changes."
"Now watch this...."
"I can do that with my eyes closed."
"Quick, they'll never find us if we hide here."
"Don't worry, it's not used any more."
"Back up a bit — I can't get you in the picture."
"So they finally fixed this elevator yesterday?"
"Listen, I'm taking a course in chemistry — I know what I'm doing."
"Yes, of course the elastic is strong enough."
"It's OK so long as you stay down wind."
"Nah, this plane's fuel gauge often gets stuck on empty."
"I wonder what happens if these two wires touch."
"Hey, don't worry, it isn't loaded."
"Please fasten your seat belts — we're about to enter some turbu...."
"Darling, did you remember to turn off the gas?"
"You have driven this before, haven't you?"
"And that one over there, the red flashing one, what does that mean?"
"I've never had one of these fail to open before."
"Look, how was I supposed to know it was upside down?"
"Are you sure they don't mind your taking their honey?"
"Say, what's that faint ticking noise?"
I look forward to the famous last words my readers will add in the comments, whether they be funny or a special memory like the one I shared.
"God will be glorified through you, whether or not you believe." — Drew Conley
He who laughs, lasts.
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