Now that the elections are past, we're hearing reports on the news about the increase in gun sales. With rising economic problems we're also hearing about more and more home invasions. The newscasters collectively scratch their heads and wonder why either of these is happening. I have some ideas about why ... do you?
I've had a piece in my files for quite a while that seemed like a good thing to share at this time. It's the story of a more subtle home invasion by a stranger and the impact on the family.
The Stranger
A few months before I was born, my dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around to welcome me into the world a few months later.
As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors: Mom taught me the word of God, and Dad taught me to obey it. But the stranger? He was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies. If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.
Sometimes Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to her room and read her books. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)
Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honor them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home ... not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our long-time visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.
my dad was a teetotaler who didn't permit alcohol in the home, not even for cooking. But the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing. I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... and NEVER asked to leave.
More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first.
Still, if you were to walk into my parents' den today you would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.
His name?
We just call him "TV" for short.
A close companion of his has moved in with us. We call her "Computer."
How does your family handle TV and computer usage, especially those of you with children in the home? Our nest is empty, but we have always tried to be very careful what was allowed to be seen and heard on our TV.
quotation...
"If all the people who name Christ were living as they ought to, our country would be going in a different direction." - Dr. Drew Conley
=^..^= =^..^=
Rob
Television enables you to be entertained in your home by people you wouldn't have in your home. --David Frost
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on Nov 13th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I didn’t have to get far into your story to recognize Mr. TV. For the first 5 years of our marriage we didn’t own one–mainly because we were too poor (Jess was still in school)! But we did eventually buy one of our own and even had cable for a while. But once our daughter came along, we reconsidered TV’s role in our home. We decided to cut the cable from our home and our budget. We still have a TV, but we use it only to watch DVDs and videos–entertainment we can moderate and control easily. I don’t think we’re culturally deprived–we still have Miss Computer and newspaper and radio to keep us informed. But I do find it funny that most of the time when I read “entertainment” news, I rarely know the person being featured!
Our daughter has grown up very comfortable with our choices. We don’t even turn the TV on unless we all sit down together to watch a movie–usually on Friday or Saturday nights. I know our choice is bizarre to most people, even in Christian circles, but we’re happy with it. 
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 1:49 pm
What a great illustration! I’m 38, a wife, homeschooling mom to four, and unapologetic about my disdain for TV. One of the greatest blessings in my life has been the fact that I grew up without one. Do we have one now? Yes, but videos and DVDs are almost exclusively watched on it. So what do we miss? The profanity, nudity, lies, etc. Are there good programs? Yes, but why wade through the garbage and commercials to get the little bit of good? Am I current on all (any of) the “good” programs? No, but at some point we have to decide that our spiritual condition is of more importance than our social standing. Lastly, it’s not as if TV is the only source of news anymore … and go read a book!
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
Shortly after I was saved and fighting the new Christian’s battle of giving up some of the old way of life, I was talking to a friend and said that I wished that sometime I would turn on the TV it just wouldn’t go on. The next time I turned it on, it didn’t go on! I wrapped up the cord and stuck it in the closet and considered it an answer to prayer.
About 10 years later we got a Commodore 64 (remember them?) and buying a color TV was cheaper than buying a color monitor. The kids got all excited when they came home and saw it, but I told them it was only for the computer. “Besides, we don’t even have an antenna, so it won’t work. See, here I’ll plug it in and show you.” Oops, we did have a picture, somewhat fuzzy, but we had a picture. The experience did give us a chance to relearn how to use the TV selectively.
Now we have Tivo and love it. We can automatically record just the programs we want and can watch them when ever we want. PLUS we never have to watch a commercial. Just press the forward button a few times and the commercials are past. An hour program is only 40 minutes long without them. Funny part is, people talk about this commercial or that and we have no idea what they’re talking about because we’ve never seen them. This also means we never have to see the sinful lifestyles and dress portrayed in commercials. When we go somewhere and watch TV without Tivo, it’s like torture having to sit through several minutes of them before getting back to the show.
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Nice thoughts on the effects and influence of TV. My wife and I do not have children yet, but we are desirous of not allowing our children to watch much television. We want to guide them toward being good readers and careful thinkers. I will need to buy a new TV in the next few months with the digital transition that is scheduled to take place in February. We’re probably going to get a nice one, but I want to avoid subscribing to cable as long as possible. I would get easily sucked in to the various sports channels and news channels if we had cable. Normal “free” TV has very little that interests me. Watching the news and the occasional sporting event is about it. That leaves lots of time for talking with my wife, doing projects around the house, and reading.
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
Hi Rob ~ I’m always interested in telling about my TV experience (or lack thereof). The summer my husband and I were getting married I borrowed our church’s van and loaded all of my belongings into it to transport to our new apartment–this included the TV I had in my bedroom at home. When my husband-to-be saw it, he asked, “What is that?” I replied, “My TV, of course!” Then he said we needed to have a little talk…which resulted in us both agreeing to not have a TV the first year of marriage so we could talk and get to know one another better without the TV occupying so much of our time. Twenty-eight years later we don’t have a TV, well, technically, we do but it only plays a snowy picture and not real programs. We use it for carefully selected videos for the family. We’ve never regretted it, although I do miss seeing the Olympics every four years.
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
I’m with Anna. My coworkers think I’m some sort of nut for not watching TV shows, but I overhear enough to know I’m missing nothing but junk! Other than “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” I have no use for them… and even then, the commercials are objectionable. Give me a video or DVD any day! We also have a TV Guardian, since we like exciting action movies without the profanity.
on Nov 13th, 2008 at 9:01 pm
@all commenters so far – It seems as if only those who have no TV or extremely limited TV are weighing in. A lot of TV is pretty hard to defend, I guess. In our home the TV is either on PBS with cooking shows, Antiques Road Show, or documentaries or else on the local news. We have little use for much else. We still have only rabbit ears. We watch DVD’s or videos also. We find ourselves listening to BBN radio more and more, and if the TV is on, it’s playing in the background while we do other things.
on Nov 14th, 2008 at 10:17 am
No TV watching for me! We own a TV only for movie watching, mostly old black and whites, the ones made when Hollywood directors could still afford script writers that could work in a plot. My computer cannot go online. If I need to go online, I use my wifes computer where she can monitor what I see. I am surprised at how I stay more current on the news than my peers.
Jonathan
on Nov 14th, 2008 at 10:49 am
I’ll add my vote to the no TV group. I grew up without one, and my kids are too. The other folks have articulated my reasons, so I won’t repeat them. I’m so glad to “miss out” on the yucky parts of our culture!
on Nov 14th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
My family got rid of our TV when I was in junior high. It went on the fritz, and my dad wisely decided not to buy a new one. We never watched it much to begin with, so although I missed it at first, I quickly got used to its absence. I do get a lot of odd looks when I tell people I don’t own a television nor care to, but there are just so many better things to do with my time!
on Nov 15th, 2008 at 9:54 am
@Jonathan, Carrie, and Jessica – you are among the ranks of my readers who do not view TV. I agree that we must evaluate our time usage and be careful to be good stewards of what precious little time we have.
on Nov 19th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
Your blog probably holds the record for the largest percentage of readers who watch very little, if any, television. Count me in that percentage…and I work at a television station. Other than doing the newscasts I don’t watch television. It’s unfortunate that it’s easier to press the “On” button on a remote control than to have a meaningful conversation with family and friends. However, those conversations are worth the extra effort; they are much more satisfying than watching strangers play-act in front of cameras.
on Nov 20th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
@Dave – I’m glad that you view interpersonal relationships as more beneficial and satisfying than mindlessly staring at a TV. How does your television station react to your not watching much of the medium?
on Nov 21st, 2008 at 9:16 pm
In answer to your question, they don’t mind much that I don’t watch television. I think you’d be quite surprised to learn that a fair number of people at the station do not watch television except for the newscasts. That’s not to say though that none of them watch television. I would say that I struggle more with the computer since I’m always writing, working on my site, and doing research.
on Nov 22nd, 2008 at 7:16 am
@Dave – That’s interesting, but I guess when you think about it, it’s not surprising. Maybe working with the medium of television all day, when you get home, you want to do something unrelated. Thanks for the clarification. And do be careful with the computer time. There are so many possibilities that it’s easy to spend large amounts of time before you even realize you have.