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Back to School Jokes

Back to school

With Labor Day this coming Monday, almost everyone who is going back to school is either in school already or getting ready to be. We find ourselves asking where the summer went! So here at the beginning of another school year, I am posting several school-related jokes that I have on file.

A student reported for his final exam which consisted of True/False questions.

He took his seat in the examination hall, stared at the test, and then in a bit of inspiration, took a quarter out of his pocket. He started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet "True" for heads and "False" for tails.

Within 30 minutes he was all done, whereas the rest of the class was still sweating it out. During the last few minutes of the exam period, the student frantically started flipping the coin again.

The moderator, concerned about what he was doing, stopped by his desk and asked if everything was ok.

"Oh yes, I'm fine. I finished the exam a half hour ago, but I'm going back through now and checking my answers!"


Teacher to class: "Give me a sentence with a direct object."

Student: "Everybody thinks our teacher is beautiful."

Teacher: "Why, thank you. But what is the direct object?"

Student: "A good report card."
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Orthography on Signs

Misspelled Signs

Someone asked me recently what the word orthography means. It's a word I seldom use in English, but as a French teacher I frequently use the word orthographie, which means spelling. The root words are ortho, which means straight or correct, and graph, which means write. That, in addition to being on the receiving end of some funny misspelled signs lately, culminates in my happily sharing them with you today.

I wonder if this next sign unwittingly forbids parking by those who cannot spell.


Some misspelling in signs are just the result of ignorance. (I hasten to add that ignorance does not mean stupidity. It simply means not knowing.) To tie in to the coffee theme of one of my recent posts, imagine what the following sign does to the heart of this French teacher and barista.
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A Job Well Done?, take 2

Week before last my blog post called A Job Well Done featured pictures of some results of people's doing their work poorly. Today's post is more pictures of other results.

The first few are some products that demonstrate a lack of knowledge in either the designer or in those executing the designs.

The t-shirt maker was right, at least, in knowing that the name of the continent begins and ends with an "A."

Which Continent?!

This next one shows that someone needs to learn some basic English grammar.
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Coffee Humor

On our trip out west earlier this summer, of course I was on the lookout for funny signs. Though not technically a sign, one that I spotted in Williams, AZ, was humorous to me as a French prof and barista since the French word for coffee is café.

Coffee and Cafe

I didn't go inside to see how they distinguished their coffee from their café, but I'm guessing that my inquiring about it probably would not have made sense to them. But honestly, the more I think about the name of the place, the odder it gets.

Yesterday morning my Keurig Mini Plus B31, which had been behaving strangely for several days, decided not to work at all. I was ready to look for a replacement until our neighbor Mary suggested I call Keurig. The woman on the phone was very nice and talked me through several steps. She finally declared my beyond-warranty Keurig defective, but she offered me a discount on a replacement. I told her I would think about it.

I remembered reading online about descaling a Keurig with white vinegar. That, after doing the Keurig rep's maneuvers with the paper clip to clean out the needles, had my little coffee maker up and running again!

I decided that maybe some coffee humor might be in order. Here are some random pictures I have been sent or pointed to, since my readers know my love for coffee. :-)

Coffee Machine Broken
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A Job Well Done?

Well Done Fortune

Does it frustrate you when people don't do their jobs well? Doing a poor job seems to be the MO of many people these days, as in not putting the fortune inside the fortune cookie. The "inspiration" for this blog post is the confluence of several events recently. One is my having started to work as a barista at a local Starbucks this summer. I wanted to have a part-time job, and since I love people and coffee, Starbucks seemed like the perfect place to apply to work. I am enjoying the job very much, and there is surprisingly much to learn, and to remember! I really want to do my job well, for the sake of my customers and of the other partners in the café.

Here's a picture of me in my barista disguise.

Rob the Barista

Another event that helped trigger today's post was the experience that a former student of mine had this week. She is currently a student at Le Cordon Bleu in Paris, France, for 9 months of culinary training. (Imagine my excitement to have a former student doing that!!!) Kerry is sharing her experiences on Facebook almost daily as they happen and then weekly in greater detail on her blog, Kerry Hands. Some of you may enjoy following her adventures.

One of Kerry's experiences recently was cooking beef, to French specifications. How done would you say the meat is in the following picture?
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