ivman's blague rotating header image loading ... please wait....

Punny Books


I remember that as a child I loved puns on book titles and authors. I've been compiling punny book titles for a while and am ready to unleash them on my readers. Some of them are more easily understood when read out loud. WARNING: You may want to be sure you are reading this in a place where you are free to LOL, or at least to groan loudly.

Having been a good little library helper in junior high, I have arranged the list in alphabetical order by the author's last name. And now as a wiser adult, I have removed from the list inappropriate ones that amused me as a junior higher. 😳

Remember — you can't always judge a book by its cover and author!

Truancy by Marcus Absent

Positive Reinforcement by Wade Ago

I Didn't Do It! by Ivan Alibi

Nuclear Explosives by Adam Baum

Songs for Children by Barbara Blacksheep

Stop Arguing by Xavier Breath

Desert Crossing by I. Rhoda Camel

Gas Guzzlers by Russ T. Carrburata

The Unsung Vegetable by R. T. Choke

Tickling Your Fancy by Kit G. Coo

French Overpopulation by Francis Crowded

Don't Touch That Light Switch! by Frieda D. Dark

I Lost My Balance by Eileen Dover and Phil Down

Prison Security by Barb Dweyer

Downpour! by Wayne Dwops

Songs from "South Pacific" by Sam and Janet Evening

French Egg Dishes by Sue Flay

Things to Do at a Fall Party by Bob N. Frapples

Pain Relief by Ann L. Gesik

It's Springtime! by D. Theresa Green

DIY House Construction by Bill Jerome Holmes

Split Personalities by Jacqueline Hyde

Unemployed by Anita Jobb

Housing Problems by Rufus Lee King

I Hate Sunlight by Gladys Knight

The Bruce Lee Story by Marsha Lartz

Fallen Garments by Lucy Lastic

Sherlock Holmes Does it Again by Scott Linyard

Rapunzel, Rapunzel by Harris Long

Fifty Yards to the Outhouse by Willy Makit and Betty Woant

The Gang's All Here by Maude D. Merria

Sleeping Beauty by Althea N. Midremes

The Art of Archery by Beau Narrow

The Scent of Man by Jim Nasium

Candle Vaulting by Jack B. Nimble

Green Lawn Furniture by Patty O'Chairs

Irish Dentistry by Perry O'Dontal

First Responders by R. U. O'Kaye

Indian-Italian Fusion Cuisine by Ravi Oley

Yoko's Robe by Kim Ono

Italian Delicacies by Liz Onya

Irish Heart Surgery by Angie O'Plasty

Nice Hotels by Mary Ott

Danger! by Luke Out

My Career As a Clown by Abe Ozo

The Monkey Cage by Jim Panzee

Where to Find Islands by Archie Pelago

Off to Market by Tobias A. Pigg

Living on a Budget by Penny Pincher

Because I Say So! by Frank O. Pinion

House Plants by Clay Potts

April Fool! by Sue Prize

The World's Deadliest Joke by Theophilus Punoval

Not Bogged Down In Reality by Jason Rainbows

Nordic Groundskeepers by Leif Raker

Don't Tread On Me by Amanda B. Reckondwith

Outdoor Activities by Alf Resco

Indiana Jones' Adventures by Darrin Rescue

Bad Investment by Les Riches

I Can Fix It by Jerry Rigg

Germs by Mike Robes

Joe Wins at the Track Meet by C. Howie Runns

Playing with the Christmas Fire by Yule B. Sari

The Telltale Heart by Stefi Scope

Maritime Rules by Paula Sea

The Twelfth Month by Dee Sember

Rules For Living by Sharon Sharalyke

Do It Yourself by Tyrone Shoelaces

He Disappeared by Otto Sight

Great Tennis Matches by Davey Skupp

Look Younger by Faye Slift

The Optimist's Handbook by Keith Smylen

Traditional Footware by Susan Socks

Teenagers of the '50's by Bobbie Sox

How to Get an Extended Tour of the Prison by Robin Steele

Weepy Movie by Maude Lynn Story

Without Warning by Oliver Sudden

Why Cars Stop by M. T. Tank

Tight Situation by Leah Tard

Keeping Old Furniture Looking Good by Ann Teak

I Was Framed! by Gil Tee

Alone at Last by Saul E. Terry

Animal Diseases by Anne Thrax

I Want to Help by Abel N. Willin

You Can Have This Job by Ike Witt

Ready...Set... by Sadie Word

Raising Flowers by Hand by Flo Wrist

Then the Lion Attacked by Claude Yarmoff

Mensa Man by Gene Yuss

Hollywood Gossip by Phyllis Zinn

The German Bank Robbery by Hans Zupp

divider

Are any of you former library helpers? I used to have my framed award on my bookcase here at home, but since it was done on a spirit duplicator, the writing eventually became so faded, that it was just a framed piece of white paper. So go earthly accolades....

quotation...

"God uses tribulation in our lives to pry our hearts off the now." — Drew Conley

=^..^= =^..^=
Rob

I have CDO — it's like OCD, but all the letters are in alphabetical order ... as they should be!


Print This Post Print This Post


If you enjoyed this post, to get updates when I post to my blog, sign up for your preferred method below — RSS, Twitter, or e-mail.



5 Comments on “Punny Books”

  1. #1 Nancy
    on Sep 26th, 2012 at 11:59 am

    I was a library aide at Speedway Junior High School. Loved every task I was given! I was hired for summer shelf reading and inventory of the full collection. I was paid minimum wage plus an ice cold bottle of Coke every morning (the library was not air conditioned) and the privilege of taking books home every afternoon, no limits.

    The good old days.

  2. #2 bj
    on Sep 27th, 2012 at 3:09 pm

    I must admit, I usually quickly skim over your “punny” posts. They just aren’t my cup of tea. This time, I read them a little more closely, and they are funny! I work at a library. This list is getting printed and posted up somewhere in here… I just wonder if someone will come to me asking where they can locate one or another of these books… Ha Ha!

  3. #3 Rela Biagiotti
    on Sep 29th, 2012 at 7:52 am

    Very entertaining! How about another one – Is It Finished? by Almo Stunn

  4. #4 Jonathan
    on Sep 29th, 2012 at 10:04 am

    Building Self Esteem by Ima Gooden

  5. #5 Laura B.
    on Oct 1st, 2012 at 10:28 am

    I used to volunteer at my Christian school library as a teenager, then went on to work at the BJU library as a student . . . now my daughter works there. Nice job to pass down through the family!

    The kids and I laughed aloud together as we read this post . . . good medicine for a rainy day.

    Real book titles and authors from our home collection:

    Outdoor Safety and Survival, by Paul H. Risk
    The Weather Identification Handbook, by Storm Dunlop