ivman's blague

My wife Becka and I have been talking about going to a Greenville Drive baseball game for a long time, but we just haven’t done it. After finding out in choir practice at church Sunday afternoon that my young friend Dan was going to be singing the national anthem at Monday night’s game, Becka and I talked about it half seriously in spite of being crazy busy. At the last minute Monday afternoon we decided we’d go to that game. (Such spontaneity, huh?!) Dan did a great job! (I knew he would because you know what the person who sits beside you in choir sounds like.)

There were a lot of things we enjoyed about our evening and a few things we could have lived nicely without, but all in all, it was a fun evening! One of the fun things was reading the slogans on the t-shirts people were wearing. Some of the t-shirts were among the things we could live nicely without, but some were clever and hilarious.

Here are some funny slogans from t-shirts. I also found some pictures of t-shirts online and add them to the mix.

Volunteering: It doesn’t pay

Camping is in-tents!

South Korea’s got Seoul

You Have the Right to Remain Silent, So Please Shut Up!

I’d Kill for a Nobel Peace Prize

I’m Not Cynical - Just Experienced

Shin: A Device for Finding Furniture in the Dark

Out of My Mind - Will Be Back Shortly

If You Can Read This, My Wife Fell Off (on the back of a biker’s t-shirt)

I Used to Be Schizophrenic, but We’re OK Now

Don’t Treat Me Any Differently Than You Would the Queen

First National Bank of Dad - Sorry, Closed

In Dog Years, I’m Dead

Get a New Car for Your Spouse. It’ll Be a Great Trade

It’s Hard to Be Nostalgic When You Can’t Remember Anything

Dinner Is Ready When the Smoke Alarm Goes Off

I’m Going to Graduate on Time, No Matter How Long It Takes

Anything Not Worth Doing Is Not Worth Doing Well

Your Village Called - Their Idiot Is Missing

No, I’m Not on Steroids, But Thanks for Asking

I Am a Bomb Technician; If You See Me Running, You Should Keep Up

For Every Action, There Is an Equal and Opposite Government Program

I Don’t Suffer From Insanity - I Enjoy Every Minute of It

Nice Perfume - Must You Marinate In It?

I Hate Golf, I Hate Golf, I Hate Golf, NICE SHOT, I Love Golf…

Nobody Knows I’m Elvis

Those Who Live by the Sword Get Shot by Those Who Don’t

You Have the Right to Remain Silent - Anything You Say Will Be Misquoted, Then Used Against You

Actually, I Am a Rocket Scientist!

Blessed Are They Who Can Laugh at Themselves, for They Shall Never Cease to Be Amused

My Dog Can Lick Anyone

I Got to Vietnam Before McDonald’s Did

I’d Quit This Job But I Need the Sleep

The Secret: Find an Age You Like and Stick to It!

I Am Not a Pack Rat - I Am a Collector

Today Was a Total Waste of Makeup

I’m Your Father, Not an ATM

I Got This Shirt When I Turned 40. I HATE This Shirt!

Never Underestimate the Power of Stupid People in Large Groups

Yes, It’s Lonely at the Top - But I Eat a Lot Better Than You

I Chose the Road Less Traveled - Now Where in the World Am I?

The Weather Is Here - Wish You Were Beautiful!

And You’re Telling Me This Because…

Don’t Make Me Put My Hand on My Hip

I Can Fix Anything - Where’s the Duct Tape?

I’m Only Wearing Black Until They Find Something Darker

My Cat Kneads Me

Dad Knows a Lot, But Grandpa Knows EVERYTHING!

I’m Dressed and Out of Bed - What More Do You Want?

You’re Just Jealous Because the Little Voices Are Talking to Me

Now I Know Why Some Animals Eat Their Young!

You Non-Conformists Are All Alike

If All the World’s a Stage, I Want Better Lighting

Our Lady of Perpetual Mood Swings

Below is a t-shirt slogan that I wanted to display larger so that the detail is more visible.

I never quite know what to wear when an invitation to an event calls for “dressy casual.” This t-shirt seems to be just the thing for such an occasion….

Our daughter Nora loves t-shirts. Here’s a picture of her and her friend Beth in front of their world view classroom map of Europe. They have t-shirts to go with the theme. (For any readers who don’t know her, Nora’s the one on the right.)

If you’d like to read more t-shirt slogans, you can find them on my pre-blog archives at http://ivman.com/tshirts.html

Have you seen any great t-shirt slogans lately? Please add a comment and tell us what you saw.

quotation…

“Today we worship the earth and deny its Creator exists.” - Dr. Drew Conley

=^..^= =^..^=
Rob

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow!

Tags: art, one-liners, t-shirts

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