Earlier this week I posted the obituary of my former German professor, colleague and friend, Edith Long. Today I am shocked to have to tell you about the death of her son Paul on the way home from his mom’s funeral. I am saddened beyond words.

With all the news coverage of Hurricane Ike yesterday and today, what would have been a huge news story - the horrible train crash in the Los Angeles area - has been pushed to the background. Paul, Karen, and Devin Long flew back home yesterday (Friday) after several days with Paul’s family here in Greenville. Paul told me after the graveside service that he was dreading having to connect through Dallas with all the news about the storm expected to go through there. As far as I know, they got through Dallas fine. However, our Lord had it in His plan that they would be aboard the Metrolink commuter train involved in yesterday’s collision. Karen and Devin each suffered minor injuries, but Paul suffered severe head trauma that resulted in his death this afternoon. Paul’s sister Gail sent me a link this afternoon to an article in the NY Times about the crash. Paul’s son Devin was interviewed shortly after the accident yesterday and quoted in the article. I put the link further down in this blog post, but the article has changed in the last hour, maybe with the news of Paul’s death. Here’s what was in the original article:

“Witnesses described a scene of instant terror. Devin Long, 16, was sitting in the middle car with his parents when the trains collided. “There was a great big jerk,” he said. “I heard what sounded like a bunch of cars colliding, like a multicar crash. Both my parents went flying. Next thing I knew, I was on the floor between the exit doors.” Mr. Long was thrown from his seat, but remained conscious.

His father, Paul Long, 56, lay unconscious but breathing by the stairwell to the second level of the double-decker car. His mother, Karen Long, 55, was injured but alert, he said. “When I saw the condition Dad was in, I sort of freaked out,” he said. “Mom was trying to communicate with Dad. I turned around and saw all the seat cushions tossed about the car. There was blood everywhere. People had cuts on their heads and faces, legs; they had many injuries.”

You may read whatever form the article now has by clicking here.

Paul was three years behind me in college, but through his mom, he and I got to know each other while I was in college and he was still in high school. We shared a very similar sense of humor. Paul was a long-time reader of my e-mails and my blog, and he sent me quite a bit of humor and even some more reflective types of things. Whenever he and his family came to Greenville to visit, we would have lunch together.

Please pray for his wife Karen and son Devin, as well as Paul’s three siblings and their families. They have not even had time to begin to process Edith’s homegoing and are in total shock about Paul’s sudden departure for heaven. We’re all reeling from the shocking suddenness of this all, but we’re comforted by the knowledge that our Lord has not lost control - this was all in His loving plan for us all.

Today, I’m going to post the last thing my friend Paul sent to me. At the beginning of his e-mail he said, “Unfortunately, I remember most of these!”

Things you don’t hear anymore…

Be sure to refill the ice trays - we’re going to have company after while.

Watch for the postman - I want to get this letter to Aunt Mary in the mail today.

Quit slamming the screen door when you are on your way out!

Put a dish towel over the cake so the flies won’t get on it.

You boys stay close by - the car may not start and I will need you to help push it off.

There’s a dollar in my purse. Get 5 gallons of gas when you go to town.

It’s getting hot. Open the back door and see if we can get a breeze through here.

Don’t forget to wind the clock before you go to bed.

Why can’t you remember to roll up your pant legs? Getting them caught in the bicycle chain so many times is tearing them up.

You have torn the knees out of that pair of pants so many times there is nothing left to put a patch on.

Don’t you go outside with your good school clothes on!

Be sure and pour the cream off the top of the milk when you open the new bottle.

If you pull that stunt again, I’m going to wear you out!

Get out from under the sewing machine; bumping it messes up the thread!

That dog is NOT coming in this house! I don’t care how cold it is out there, dogs just don’t come in the house.

Wash your feet before you go to bed. They are nasty from playing outside all day barefooted.

Take that empty bottle to the store with you so you won’t have to pay a deposit on another one.

Quit jumping on the floor! I have a cake in the oven and you are going to make it fall if you don’t quit!

Let me know when the Fuller Brush man comes by - I need to get a few things from him.

You can walk to the store; it won’t hurt you to get some exercise.

Don’t sit too close to the TV. It’s hard on your eyes.

Go out to the well and draw a bucket of water so I can wash dishes.

It is time for your system to get cleaned out. I am going to give you a dose of castor oil tonight.

If you get a spanking in school and I find out about it, you’ll get another one when you get home.

Quit crossing your eyes! They will get stuck that way!

quotation…

“He is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.” Jim Elliot

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Rob

“So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

Today’s iv is something I ran across in my files as I began to look for material for upcoming Father’s Day posts. This was so nice, I couldn’t resist sharing it now.

A man’s daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed. The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit.

“I guess you were expecting me,” he said.

“No, who are you?” said the father.

“I’m the new minister at your church,” he replied. “When I saw the empty chair, I figured you knew I was going to show up.”

“Oh yeah, the chair,” said the bedridden man. “Would you mind closing the door?”

Puzzled, the minister shut the door. “I have never told anyone this, not even my daughter,” said the man. “But all of my life I have never known how to pray. At church I used to hear the pastor talk about prayer, but it went right over my head.” “I abandoned any attempt at prayer,” the old man continued, “until one day about four years ago my best friend said to me, ‘Joe, prayer is just a simple matter of having a conversation with Jesus. Here is what I suggest: Sit down in a chair. Place an empty chair in front of you, and in faith see Jesus on the chair. It’s not spooky because he promised He would always be with us. Then just speak to him in the same way you’re doing with me right now.’”

“So, I tried it and I’ve liked it so much that I do it a couple of hours every day. I’m careful though. If my daughter saw me talking to an empty chair, she’d either have a nervous breakdown or send me off to the funny farm.”

The minister was deeply moved by the story and encouraged the old man to continue on the journey. Then he prayed with him and returned to the church.

Two nights later the daughter called to tell the minister that her daddy had died that afternoon.

“Did he die in peace?” he asked.

“Yes, when I left the house about two o’ clock, he called me over to his bedside, told me he loved me and kissed me on the cheek. When I got back from the store an hour later, I found him dead.

“But there was something strange about his death. Apparently, just before Daddy died, he leaned over and rested his head on the chair beside the bed. What do you make of that?”

The minister wiped a tear from his eye and said, “I wish we could all go like that.”

2 Corinthians 5:7 reminds us that “we walk by faith, not by sight.”

quotation…

“Today you and I are walking billboards, declaring either that the gospel is powerful and true or that it is weak and false. … Am I really part of what Jesus does in people’s lives, or am I part of some kind of culture?” - Dr. Drew Conley

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Rob

Do you ever feel like you’re diagonally parked in a parallel universe?

Tuesday of this week is April Fools’ Day here in the US and in many other countries. What I’m posting today seems as if it could be an April Fools’ story, but I’ve checked in out on snopes.com and found that it’s all too true!

Barbara Sue Manire passed away on her 64th birthday in 2005. Her tombstone pictured below is the way it looked for the first year after her burial in the Highland Cemetery in Okemah, Oklahoma.

In case you can’t read it clearly, the epitaph reads, “Our mom … Her humor lives on.” Here’s why….

Barbara Sue Manire, a women with a great sense of humor, always used to say that when she died she wanted a parking meter on her grave that says ‘Expired.’ Barbara Sue’s daughter, Sherri Ann Weeks confirmed that such an unusual decorative feature on her mother’s tombstone was indeed her mother’s idea. Sherri said, “Mom always said she wanted a parking meter with ‘time expired.’ And she wanted to be on the front row of the cemetery so she could see what was going on. We gave her what she wanted. … Our dad wanted his final inscription to be ‘I told ‘em I was sick,’” said Weeks, “but we were never sure if he was serious about it. With Mom, she talked about the parking meter all the time. We knew she wanted it.”

The parking meter wasn’t placed at the time Barbara Sue Manire was buried since they weren’t sure if it was the right thing to do after all. Her family mulled the whole idea over for about a year before Sherri’s brother, Terry Heiskill, bought the meter on eBay. A hole was drilled in the gravestone to accommodate the parking meter.

Below are two different angles on the meter itself.

You can see the tombstone online by clicking here

chickadee update…

The last several times I’ve peeked into the bird house, the mama has been on her eggs. So I don’t know at this point how many eggs there are currently. More details as they become available….

quotation…

Give us a sense of humor.
Give us the grace to see a joke,
To get some humor out of life,
And pass it on to other folk.

- author unknown

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Rob

Fools rush in - and get all the best seats.

As I was looking through my files, trying to decide what to post, I ran across something I thought most of my readers will not have seen how two people look at the one remaining parachute.

The Parachute Paradigm

You are one of two people on a malfunctioning airplane, and there’s only one parachute. Here’s how you would handle the situation if you were a member of one of the following professions or philosophical outlooks…

Pessimist - you refuse the parachute because you might die in the jump anyway.

Optimist - you refuse the parachute because people have survived crashes like this before.

Procrastinator - you play a game of Monopoly - the winner gets the parachute.

Bureaucrat - you order a feasibility study on parachute use in multi-engine aircraft under code red conditions.

Lawyer - you agree to handle a lawsuit against the airline for a fee of one parachute.

Doctor - you tell your fellow traveler that you need to run more tests, then take the parachute in order to make it to your next appointment.

Sales executive - you sell the parachute to your fellow traveler at top retail rates and get the names of their friends and relatives who might like one too.

Internal Revenue Service - you confiscate the parachute along with your fellow traveler’s luggage, wallet, and gold fillings.

Engineer - you make another parachute out of aisle curtains and dental floss.

Scientist - you give your fellow traveler the parachute and ask him to send you a report on how well it worked.

Mathematician - you refuse to accept the parachute without proof that it will work in all cases.

Philosopher - you ask how one can know that the parachute actually exists.

English major - you explicate simile and metaphor in the parachute instructions.

Comparative Linguist - you read the parachute instructions in all four languages.

Computer Scientist - you design a machine capable of operating a parachute as well as a human being could.

Economist - you plot a demand curve by asking your fellow traveler, at regular intervals, how much he would pay for a parachute.

Psychoanalyst - you ask your fellow traveler what the shape of a parachute reminds him of.

Actor - you tie your fellow traveler down so they can watch you develop the character of a person stuck on a falling plane without a parachute, before trying to find a stunt man to jump out for you at the last possible moment.

Artist - you hang the parachute on the wall and sign it.

Republican - as you jump out with the parachute, you tell your fellow traveler to work hard and not expect handouts.

Democrat - you extract a dollar from your fellow traveler to buy scissors so you can cut the parachute into two equal pieces.

Libertarian - after reminding your fellow traveler of his constitutional right to have a parachute, you take it and jump out.

Ross Perot - you tell your fellow traveler not to worry, since it won’t take you long to learn how to fix a plane.

Surgeon General - you issue a warning that skydiving can be hazardous to your health.

Association of Tobacco Growers - you explain very patiently that despite a number of remarkable coincidences, studies have shown no link whatsoever between airplane crashes and death.

Environmentalist - you refuse to use the parachute unless it is biodegradable.

Auto Mechanic - you immediately start to look at the plane engine since, as long as you are looking at it, it works fine.

***
The Modern Language Department plays went very well Saturday evening. I was particularly proud of my students in the French play. Their hard work was evident, and everyone seemed to enjoy our play. Below is a picture of the cast members and directors of the three plays. Most of those involved with the French play are in the top row.

Here’s the cast of the French play. What a fun group!

quotation…

“The gospel is about what God has done. … The gospel rescues those who know they can’t make it.” - Dr. Drew Conley

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Rob

If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you!

I hate to be the bearer of sad news, but….

Today we mourn the passing of an old friend by the name of Common Sense.

Common Sense lived a long life but died from heart failure not far into this new millennium. No one really knows how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, factories, and offices, helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness.

For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, the early bird gets the worm, and life isn’t always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not the kids), and it’s okay to come in second (or even last, as long as you gave it your best efforts).

A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived cultural and educational trends including feminism, body piercing, whole language, and “new math.”

But his health declined when he became infected with the “If-it-helps-only-one-person-it’s-worth-it” virus. In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well-intentioned overbearing regulation.

He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero tolerance policies. Reports of six-year-old boys charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for using mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student but cannot inform the parent when the female student is pregnant or wants an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in everything from Boy Scouts to professional sports. Finally, when a woman, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel.

As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept informed of developments, regarding questionable regulations for low-flow toilets, “smart” guns, mandatory air bags, most recently incandescent light bulbs, and the potential regulation of rocking chairs.

Finally when told that homeowners associations restricted exterior furniture only to that which enhanced property values, he breathed his last.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers: My Rights, I. M. Tolerant and Ima Whiner.

His funeral was not well attended because so few realized that he was gone.

quotation…

“Jesus didn’t die for the stupid things we do. He died for our sins. If I just call my sin ’something stupid I did,’ I’m not truly repentant.” - Dr. Jim Berg

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Rob

One thing about common sense is that it isn’t.