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Posts Tagged ‘sleep’

Sleeping on the Job?

On the evening news tonight we saw a report about more and more people falling asleep at work. They said that there's an epidemic of Americans not getting sufficient sleep at night. Some "experts" are recommending not only that Americans try to get more sleep, but also that businesses give their employees a little nap break to help them with this problem. Our wellness program at the university seems to be helping many of us with issue. Anyway, this made me think of something to share with you about sleeping on the job....

The 21 best responses if you are found asleep at your desk (not to be used in class, of course)...

21. "Oh, man! I come in at 6 in the morning, and look what happens!"

20. "This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!"

19. "You don't discriminate against those with Latient Atrophy Zymosis Yeast syndrome, do you?!?"

18. "They told me at the blood bank that this might happen."

17. "Oh, hi there. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands."

16. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."

15. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the Liquid Paper."

14. "I was just meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"

13. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"

12. "I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance."

11. "I'm doing the Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend."

10. "It worked well for Reagan, didn't it?"

9. "Just pacing myself for an all-nighter here at work tonight!"

8. "I was working smarter, not harder."

7. "Auggh! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

6. "I'm in the management training program."

5. "The coffee machine is broken...."

4. "Someone must've put the decaf in the wrong pot this morning."

3. "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"

2. "Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!"

1. "...and I especially thank you for my excellent boss. Amen!"

Today I received an interesting picture called "Haircut of the Year" that I thought others might enjoy seeing. Truly bizarre!

Hope you had a nice Bonza Bottler Day today. Mine was just a standard day of classes, except that midterm grades were due.


"The Bible doesn't talk about rights. It talks about responsibility." - John Hutcheson

=^..^= =^..^=

Do you ever get tired of sleeping?

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The Seven Ages of the Married Cold

Often my blog posts are related to something happening in our lives, and this one is no exception. Since Friday morning, I've been battling a head cold - something I haven't done in a long time and something that's making the rounds right now. During classes Friday, I was quite miserable, with a nose that had been replaced by a faucet. After dinner Friday evening, I went to bed at 6:30 and slept for 12 hours straight - something I never do! Our cats - Adelaide and Clementine - were a riot! Adelaide, whom we lovingly call "Florence Nightingale," was curled up next to me the entire 12 hours! At 6:15 Saturday morning, Clementine started digging at the closet door to try to wake me up, and Adelaide started walking around on the bed, crying, and sticking her nose in my face - I guess to see if I were still breathing. I fell back asleep and immediately dreamed that I was staring at a computer, and an e-mail notify message popped up from our two cats, concerned about my having slept so long. I woke up laughing, which felt good. I slept away a lot of the weekend getting 31 hours of sleep totally! But I feel much better this morning to face a week of classes.

My dear wife has been so sweet this weekend. (Can you even imagine her being anything but sweet?!) She made a big pot of her wonderful cabbage soup to help speed my recovery. It made me think of something I've had in my files for a long time. I share that with you today.

Some years ago The Saturday Evening Post ran an article that was entitled “The Seven Ages of the Married Cold.” This article revealed the reactions of a husband to his wife’s colds during their first seven years of marriage. It's a rather humorous look at a not-so-funny reality - the potential decline of a marriage, as seen through the common cold. I hope I do better than the husband in what you're about to read!

The Seven Ages of the Married Cold

First Year: “Sugar dumpling, I’m really worried about my baby girl. You’ve got a bad sniffle and there’s no telling about these things with all this strep going around. I’m putting you in the hospital this afternoon for a general checkup and a good rest. I know the food’s lousy, but I’ll be bringing your meals in from Rossini’s. I’ve already got it all arranged with the floor superintendent.”

Second Year: “Listen darling, I don’t like the sound of that cough. I’ve called Doc Miller and asked him to rush over here. Now you go to bed like a good girl, please, just for papa.”

Third Year: “Maybe you’d better lie down, honey; nothing like a little rest when you feel lousy. I’ll bring you something. Have you got any canned soup?”

Fourth Year: “Now look dear, be sensible. After you’ve fed the kids, washed the dishes, and finished the floors, you’d better lie down.”

Fifth year: “Why don’t take a couple of aspirin?”

Sixth year: “I wish you would just gargle something instead of sitting around all evening barking like a seal.”

Seventh year: “For Pete’s sake, stop sneezing! Are you trying to give me pneumonia?”


I found a great picture online somewhere during the Christmas break - the way one student dealt with the pertussis scare we had at BJU in early December. I hope none of my students come to class looking like this today, fearful of catchin my cold....


"Magnifying God isn't making Something small big. It's focusing on Something that, from our perspective, seems small and seeing how big He is." - Dr. Drew Conley

=^..^= =^..^=

If a man caught a cold in the middle of a forest where no one could hear him, would he still make whining sounds?

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Joys of Aging

One of the true joys of aging is seeing your children become responsible adults. Another joy is grandchildren. Our daughter Megan and grandson Drew arrived at 2:30 this morning. It was sheer bliss to see Drew's face light up when he saw Grandma and Grandpa. Our first guess as to why was that he remembered us from all our bonding this summer. Our second guess was that we looked pretty funny at that time of the night. Our third guess was that he is simply a gregarious little guy who smiles at just about anyone. Megan confirmed that our third guess was correct. Sigh! We're doing our best to make ourselves memorable during this all-too-short three day visit. We've learned that having grandkids is one of the true joys of aging!

Here are a few pictures from the day today.

Here's a picture of Megan and Drew...

We got to see first hand how much Drew is enjoying baby food - here rice cereal and sweet potatoes...

Grandma loves holding her little guy again...

And Grandma and Grandpa can't give our little guy enough hugs and kisses...

Aunt Nora is really good at getting Drew to laugh...

Grandpa does his fair share of causing smiles and laughter...

This afternoon Drew and I enjoyed a little nap after our short night's sleep and our busy day...

This weekend my odometer flips another number. As my family plans a little birthday celebration for me, I get to choose from some games appropriate for folks my age.

Game choices for my birthday bash this weekend:

1. Sag - You're It!
2. Hide and Go Sleep
3. Hide and Go Seek Your Own Easter Eggs (a variation on the previous game)
4. 20 Questions Shouted into Your Good Ear
5. Kick the Bucket
6. Red Rover, Red Rover, the Nurse says Bend Over
7. Spin the Bottle of Liniment
8. Musical Recliners
9. Simon Says Something Incoherent
10. Pin the Toupee on the Bald Guy


"God does not view being 'laid back' in the Christian life as a virtue." - Dr. Ken Casillas

=^..^= =^..^=

My dream: to die young at a very old age.

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