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What Do You Get When You Cross a…?

picture of DNA

I don't usually think much about genetics, but lately it's been brought back into focus in our lives. Our appearance and myriad other physical traits come from our ancestors through our parents. Among those traits are tendencies toward certain ailments, allergies, etc. It's all written into our DNA. For instance, diabetes does not run in my family — it gallops! I knew that it was not a matter of if, but rather when, I would become diabetic. On my mom's side of the family, at least three generations before mine have all developed type 2 diabetes. I am now dealing with being officially pre-diabetic, doing my best through lifestyle changes to delay the development of diabetes as long as possible.

My wife Becka learned some years ago that she is allergic to aspirin (more accurately salicylates), just as her mother was. Through our daughter Nora's recent experiences, it appears that she has inherited the same allergy. Our son Mark has had the same reaction I had [1] to the cleaning agent now used on blood donors. Fortunately our kids have inherited Becka's good eyesight and not my poor vision. Unfortunately Mark has inherited my flat, narrow feet. And if what we're told about diabetes and genetics is true, my children will probably all develop diabetes at some point in the future, as will my grandchildren, and so on. Sorry, kids.

Some time ago, I found a fun picture that illustrates how genetics works.

picture of genetics

Twins, especially identical twins, hold a special fascination for many of us. I loved both of the following geeky explanations for twinning.

picture of twins

picture of twins

This past summer when we visited the petting zoo at the Creation Museum [2], we saw the zonkey and the zorse. Here's a picture of the two of them together.

picture of zonkey and zorse

On their website they have an article called Horses of a Different Color [3] about these two animals.

As a spin-off of all these considerations, I'll share a few "What do you get when you cross a...?" jokes.

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a cow?
An animal that can milk itself.

What do you get when you cross a sheep and a rainstorm?
A wet blanket.

What do you get when you cross a snake with a set of building blocks?
A boa constructor.

What do you get when you cross a worm with an elephant?
Great big holes in your garden.

What do you get when you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot?
A bite in shining armour.

What do you get when you cross a tourist and an elephant?
Something that carries its own trunk.

What do you get when you cross a thief with an orchestra?
Robbery with violins.

What do you get when you cross a labrador dog with a tortoise?
An animal that goes to fetch and comes back with last week's newspaper.

What do you get when you cross a flea with a rabbit?
Bugs Bunny.

What do you get when you cross poison ivy with four-leaf clovers?
A rash of good luck!

What do you get when you cross an artist with a policeman?
A brush with the law.

What do you get when you cross a baby with a UFO?
An unidentified crying object.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish and they have twins?
A pair of swimming trunks.

What do you get when you cross a spider with a horse?
I don't know, but if it bites you, you can ride it to the hospital.


Do you have a favorite joke in this genre that you'd like to share in the comments?


"I like to tell people I want no child left on his behind. Kids don't need to go to a gym or lift weights. They just need to play." - Keith-Thomas Ayoob, RD, as quoted by The Spokesman-Review

=^..^= =^..^=

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.