During our week of "forced vacation" - a gift we would not have given ourselves (we don't normally give gifts that expensive!!!) - we got some extra, much-needed rest and did some little jobs around Jim and Meg's house that they don't normally have time for. We also got in some extra reading. For those especially who don't have time to read books as long as War and Peace or the unabridged version of Les Misérables, here's a list of books that, because of their subject matter, are all *extremely* short.
WARNING - Almost anything that one could poke fun at is probably found in this list. Laugh at the things you find amusing, and skip over the rest, knowing that others may be skipping over what you've just laughed at! I have even left in some that make fun of things dear to me!
The World's Thinnest Books...
An Airhead's Advice on Logical Thinking
A Guide to Arab Democracies
A Guide to Aboriginal Etiquette
A Journey Through the Mind of a Squid
America's Most Popular Lawyers
A Millennium of German Humor
Anagrams of the Word "A"
Beauty Secrets, by Janet Reno
Bedouin Olympic Swimmers
Behave Yourself, by David Letterman
Blind Dates That Worked Out
Bob Dole: A Collection of Motivational Speeches
Burger King Items That Start with "Mc"
Career Opportunities for History Majors
Cooking Gourmet Dishes with Tofu
Countries Where Socialism Is Successful
Detroit, A Travel Guide
Ethiopian Tips on World Dominance
Everything Men Know About Women
Everything Women Know About Men
Famous Italian War Heroes
Favorite Foreign Emigration Destinations of the French
French Military Victories
Good Norwegian Jokes
Household Uses for Plutonium
How I Served My Country, by Jane Fonda
How to Be a Successful Politician, by Jesse Jackson
How to Sustain a Musical Career, by Art Garfunkel
How We Helped After Katrina, by Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton
Italian War Heroes
Jewish Sports Legends
Law & Order, by Mayor Marion Barry, Washington D.C.
Marcel Marceau's Greatest Speeches
Mike Tyson's Guide to Dating Etiquette
My Book of Morals, by Bill Clinton, foreword by Jesse Jackson
My Favorite Barbers, by Yassir Arafat
My Plan to Find the Real Killer, by O. J. Simpson
My Tips on Personal Hygiene, by Osama Bin Laden
National Directory of Irish AA Members
Olympic Athletes Who Think Sports Are Really Stupid
Spotted Owl Recipes, by the EPA
One-Legged Folk Dances
On Human Rights, by Fidel Castro
Proper Pronunciation and Elocution, by George W. Bush and Arnold Schwarzenegger
Proud Parents of Rock Musicians
Public Political Activities During Franco's Government in Spain
Scottish World Cup Successes
Staple Your Way to Success
Successful Applications of Artificial Intelligence
Sylvester Stallone's Dramatic Acting Tips
The Amish Phone Book
The Best Recipes from England
The Engineer's Guide to Fashion
The Genius of Barry Manilow
The Road to Lasting Economic Success, by Boris Yeltsin
Things I Can't Afford, by Bill Gates
Things I Like about Road Construction, by Rob "ivman" Loach
Things We Know To Be True, by Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and John Kerry
Things I Love About Bill, by Hillary Clinton
Things We Love About the USA, by Jane Fonda and Cindy Sheehan. Illustrated by Michael Moore
Things I Would Not Do for Money, by Dennis Rodman
Things That Look Like an Apple, Taste Like an Apple, But Are Not an Apple
Things You Could Buy at the World Artichoke Festival
Vice Presidents with Really Good Ideas
Ways I Have Avoided Scandal, by Bill Clinton
Ways I Effectively Modulate My Vocal Tone, by Hillary Clinton
Why People Are More Important Than Animals, by Greenpeace
For those interested in an update after our accident...
After getting our car back late in the morning yesterday (Friday the 13th), Becka and I drove back home to Greenville, arriving at about 12:20 this morning.
We really appreciated the cheerfulness and the help of the guys in the body shop at Dorian Ford in Clinton Twp, MI, as they repaired all the damage done under our car by the concrete in the road. My main contact person there was Allen Vukmirovich, the body shop foreman - a really nice guy who worked hard in our behalf. Thanks, Allen! (His picture is below.)
We thoroughly enjoyed our time with Megan, Jim, and Drew, and we miss them already. But, as always, it is nice to be back home. We were surprised when we figured it up that we have been able to spend three whole weeks this summer with Megan and her family!
Our 700-mile "test drive" of our repaired car went well, except for a couple of traffic jams that added a total of an hour to our trip. (A tip for anyone considering a drive south on I-75 through Lexington, KY - plan some delay into your trip. Because of road destruction, three lanes are narrowed to two lanes between mile markers 111 and 109, right about where I 64 goes off to the east. The 5-mile traffic back up began at mile marker 116.) Fortunately we had just stopped for gas and dinner a couple of miles before that.
We spent so much time simply enjoying our grandson Drew, that we suddenly realized that we had taken hardly any pictures! We snapped off some desperate, last-minute pictures before leaving. Here are several:
Drew is almost as long as this section of the Pack 'n Play now!
We tried to get some smiles out of him as we said goodbye outside ... finally with success!
We miss that little smile very much already!
"We make choices, but God is in control the whole time." - Dr. Bob Payne
If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
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